For this Valentines Day, who better to teach us about love and all that rubbish than Anthony Quinn?

That’s right, Zorba the Greek recorded an entire album of “love songs”, or rather, of him pondering about “love” while most likely drunk in a studio, along with the Harold Spina Singers and Orchestra.

If you have difficulties expressing your emotions to someone you love, let Anthony Quinn show you how it’s done.

In “What is Love”, Quinn tells his long time wife romantic gems such as “I don’t even know that I love you NOW! but I’m aah…comf-ta-bull-ah”, or “You’re a headache I can put up with” or “I don’t even mind at bedtime when you take off that girdle and you yawn and scratch yer-self” and “I uh….I guess I love you”.

Rest assured, Quinn was not 100% serious when he released this LP. The idea came to him at a party with Spina, when they were both bamboozled and kidding around. It was so funny, they decided to record it.

Shockingly, the ladies failed to appreciate Quinn’s sense of humour, and the album didn’t break any record sales.

I, however, LOVE IT!

Anthony Quinn – In My Own Way…I Love You
Anthony Quinn – What is Love
Anthony Quinn – Love is a Headache

I was going to post something completely different for today’s 2nd Halloween audio freebie, but then I spotted *this* little gem lying around in our music room and decided this would be a lot more fun! I love all the screaming, novelty goofball Halloween 60s tracks as much as anyone else, but product music oddities such as this one also entertain me to no end. I can’t say I’m very familiar with Winchell’s Donuts as I don’t think they ever crossed the border to Canada, but I’m sure I haven’t missed out on much.

This record, I should point out, is brought to you today by the man with whom I share, among many other things, a record collection: Mr. Otis Fodder. Even the more special, Otis still remembers going to Winchell’s Donuts as a child around Halloween time with his mom, getting the record with a box of donuts, bringing it home and listening to it. Which is quite amazing, because all the records I had as a child have certainly not been subject to the same, attentive care as this one!

Otis also included the track in his infamous 2 volume Halloween CD-series called “Ghouls With Attitude“, a compilation that has travelled all over the Internet since its release in 2004. Shockingly, Otis never kept a copy, and while trying to find a copy online today we came across a blogger who recently posted both volumes, which I’m happy to report you can download here and here).

The record, in a nutshell, has a Vincent Price-like voice actor telling a “scary” story to children (who don’t seem the least bit scared or impressed). Mr Creepy voice actor makes it very difficult not to cringe or laugh at his not-so-subtle product placement at the end of the story, when he tells the children that “Winchell’s Donuts does magic things to your mouth”.
:

Note to self: start using words like “flame retardant” more in conversations.

Waaaaatch oooout for ghooooooosts!!

Winchell’s Donuts Spooky Sounds & Scary Tales MP3

In an effort to be original, I decided to offer a few Halloween treats to the world, every day until this Saturday! Cue applause!

I love every freak singer that Halloween has ever produced! From John Zacherley to everyone’s hero Screaming Lord Sutch, it seems that putting on a cape and causing hilarious mayhem has become a lost art.

Our first weirdo du jour hails from France. I bet you didn’t know France had it’s very own caped freak, huh? Fear not, neither did anyone else!

My many efforts to find out who this Wilfrid Du Pont de la Carpe is have been fruitless. The only hint the record gives us is that both songs have been written and adapted by Frank Gérald, who famously wrote songs with Pierre Delanoë, including a lot of stuff from Les Parisiennes, Françoise Hardy (Le premier bonheur du jour) and countless French classics. Could it be that Wilfrid is Frank, and vice-versa? Is life really that simple?

Another enigma that I hope someone will be able to help with concerns the song I am featuring today: “L’arrière petit-fils de Frankenstein” (Frankenstein’s great grandson). The record suggests that this is a French adaptation. Does anyone know what the original is and who sang it? The single is from 1975.

As someone who grew up watching French TV and cartoons, Wilfrid’s voice sounds very familiar, and I wouldn’t be surprised to learn he was a voice actor, like Monique Thubert.

Wilfrid’s ultimate tactics to scare the beejeezus out of you, besides the fact that he’s Frankenstein’s great grandson, are exagerated, outlandish uses of “Moooaaa-aaa-aaa-aaa” and “Eee-eee-haaa-aaaaaa”.

Sleep tight!

Wilfrid Du Pont de la Carpe – L’arrière petit-fils de Frankenstein

Henri Salvador, the last true survivor of the French “chanson”, has passed away last week at the age of 90. He was active until his last breath, and did a farewell tour only last December in France. He laughed and smiled through life and through his career.

Here is my favorite song of his for your listening pleasure: the delicious, mother effing weird and brilliant “Beta Gamma l’ordinateur”, in which he describes the world in 2000 through the eyes of a typical (albeit brainwashed) man. For the first time since I started this blog, I feel I should translate lyrics to a song.

“I am a man from the year 2000, I don’t have any problems
I lead a simple life, I don’t think anymore
We have a King who thinks for us, his name is
Beta Gamma, the Computer.

I am a man who is never hungry
I don’t understand why generations before us
Took pleasure in eating
We just eat pills made by
Beta Gamma, the Computer

When I go for a ride in my car
I never drive leisurely
I have a digital map
That plans ahead for me

As for girls, no problem
I don’t waste time telling them
I love them
Every night I must get
A girl that was pre-selected by
Beta Gamma, the Computer

When I think of all those before us
Who couldn’t live without love
I tell you we are happier today
For the man of the year 2000, happiness is
Beta Gamma, the Computer

I don’t know about you, but this sums up the so-called new Millenium to a tee. Wouldn’t you think?

Aurevoir Henri!

Henri Salvador – Beta Gamma, l’ordinateur